Table of Contents

CPE Essay Sample 1

CPE Essay Question

Here is a CPE essay question that my student sent me:

"What policies can we follow to reduce traffic in the town centre?

-cycle paths
-fines
-public transport

Some opinions expressed during the meeting:

"Cycling everywhere isn't realistic - what about large families?"
"Fines mean the rich will continue driving."
"Nobody uses the existing buses and trams!"

Write 240-280 words."

Write a plan for this question below:

Online Template: https://studentlanguages.com/caewritingplantemplate/

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Hardcopy Template:

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Essay Sample 1 - Answer

"It is generally acknowledged that the traffic jams in our town centre are becoming considerably severe nowadays. Governments could take actions accordingly in order to achieve this goal. In this essay, I intend to examine two opinions presented with regards to this topic.

First and foremost, modernising public transport would make people’s commute significantly easier. To demonstrate this point, I would like to take Melbourne as an example in which we can witness an up-to-date infrastructure which is served by a variety of forms of public transport, such as trains, trams and buses. As a result, not only do the commuters save time, but they also have a more accessible and convenient transport system, not to mention the environmental benefits of having fewer cars in the city centre.

On the other hand, insofar as setting regulations and restrictions on the traffic in urban areas is concerned, one option could be the introduction of government toll charges. To clarify this point, by charging drivers, there should be a resultant drop in driver numbers and cars on the roads. Not only this, but the government could also utilize the revenue from the toll charge back into the introduction of technologies that will reduce pollution and thus, protect our mother earth. In this way, not only could the traffic be reduced, but it also will be helpful for our environment and sustainability.

After all the aforementioned matters are considered, it is fair to say that establishing restrictions by tolls is the most effective method to decreasing traffic congestion in the town centre due to the fact that it is powerful enforcement."

Write down the mistakes and corrections for this answer:

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Hardcopy Template: https://studentlanguages.com/caewritingcorrections2/

Essay Sample 1 - Mistakes

Complete the examiner assessment scale template for this answer:

Online Scale: https://studentlanguages.com/caewritingscaletemplate/

Hardcopy Scale:

https://studentlanguages.com/caewritingscaletemplate2/

Essay Sample 1 - Assessment Scale Critique

Subscale	Mark (1-5)	Commentary
Content	3	All the points of the task have been addressed and the target reader is fully informed as to which policy would be more effective in reducing traffic in the town centre.
Communicative Achievement	2	The main points in the paragraph are generally easy to follow. The sentences in the introduction could flow together in a better way. Occasionally the reader may lose engagement due to an unfamiliar collocation or choice of words. The writing generally follows the conventions of an essay and the language is appropriately formal and generally engaging: ‘thus protect our mother earth’ Some more complex ideas are put forward effectively.
Organisation	2	The essay generally has a clear structure which is helped by the use of separate paragraphs and good linking words and phrases: ‘First and foremost’ On an individual paragraph level the main arguments have been well developed with appropriate linking words, other cohesive devices and organisational patterns used to good effect: ‘To demonstrate this point’ ‘as a result’ ‘...which is served by…’ ‘Not to mention…’
Language	2	There is a range of everyday and less common vocabulary evident in the writing: ‘Significantly easier’ ‘Aforementioned’ There are also a range of grammatical structures used: ‘One option could be…’ ‘Not only could…’ There are occasional inappropriate word choices but these do not impede communication to a large extent.

Add any useful language, vocabulary, grammar and other tips you’ve learnt from this writing to this online worksheet: https://studentlanguages.com/caewritingtips/ or to this hardcopy worksheet: https://studentlanguages.com/cae-writing-vocabulary-tips-advice/